No Hollywood screenwriter could have concocted the real-life political perfect storm wreaking havoc on 2020 — and the year is not finished with us yet. With an unprecedented presidential election looming over us like a slow-mo tsunami, and the possibility of no real resolution in the foreseeable future, I’d like to offer an alternative to our current un-United States of disarray.
Bogus ballots, a beleaguered Postal Service, recounts and re-recounts? No need to fret over such outdated and dysfunctional procedurals. Hell, for a moment, let’s even disregard the current candidates. With state-of-the-art animatronic and holographic technology, a little spliced DNA wizardry, and a smidgen of CGI, the president our country collectively deserves is literally at our fingertips.
My fellow Americans, I’d like to nominate our first virtual president.