Most moms have stories about the times when things didn’t go right. One of mine is of the whole family — me, dad, and two young children — coming down with a gastro-intestinal flu. All of us; all around the same time. That was a week from ... not fun. We did survive. However, as much as I appreciate survival, I would never want to be judged for my parenting skills based on that period. Thinking outward, I realize that other moms have to navigate their own dilemmas around the huge variety of illnesses and accidents that befall humans, and there are things worse than the flu.
May is the month for mental health awareness. Almost smack-dab in the middle — May 14 — is Mother’s Day. Put these together, add a dash of post-pandemic angst and a rapidly changing worldview knocking us off balance from time to time — and social connections become critically important. Mother’s Day tempts us into idealization. A dose of reality might better serve the moms grappling with roles that carry huge responsibility and little training or support. This is particularly true for moms living with mental challenges.
Mental health is one of the last fields left in the dark. It is just now becoming recognized as important. We are starting to assemble the tools to explore how the mind stays well or is damaged — and how to correct damage. Genomics, functional brain imaging, and determining successful treatment through scientific processes are a few modern factors that have advanced understanding since roughly the turn of the millennium. There is a lag, though. Many people haven’t yet caught onto the information surfacing, and stigma sticks to mental illnesses like a dark-magic spell that makes those who come down with mental illnesses feel particularly lonely.